Here are the top 5 reasons I like to run.
1. 1. It makes me feel productive, especially after sitting in a chair for like at least eight hours of the day.
2. 2. It helps me clear my head.
3. 3. It makes me feel stronger.
4. 4. It helps me sleep better.
5. 5. I hear it (eventually) will make my legs look better.
You see, I kind of lied. One of the main reasons I run isn’t really for any of those reasons. It’s to get a smaller tummy of course! I’ve been culturally predisposed to think that my stomach is NEVER small enough, not has been, not will be, not is, e v e r small enough. Honestly it’s quite exhausting if you ask me, but none the less my head believes that my stomach is not pretty* unless in six-pack form (or you know some versions and angles in four pack form). You may now ask, has my stomach ever been in six-pack or even four-pack form? Why no it hasn’t which is preciously the reason I’ve never liked it.
Anyway, isn’t this a silly idea? It’s stupid really, I don’t judge other peoples stomachs. Well okay honestly I might judge a few but all in all I try hard to not do that to other people. With myself I am truly 100% my own worst enemy. My husband thinks the whole thing is RIDIC, he tells me “everyone is supposed to have a stomach, your trying to achieve a non-stomach” a ‘non-stomach’ huh? “No” I say, “I’m just trying to”…. to well to be something I’m not.
The fact that in my whole 23 years of life I have never even been that close to having a four pack (let alone six pack) should give me a pretty good heads up that if that’s what I want, I’ll have to devote a lot more time than I am. Who wants to live that way anyway? I don’t… I’m too hard on myself already and I’m definitely not doing 2 a day work outs just have the same stomach as an airbrushed workout magazine model.
So, where is my point in all this? Besides talking and probably sharing TMI about my tummy? Hmm… Well I’m not sure I have a point just some random thoughts. While running today and thinking about all of this, I realized that I’m so quick to jump on extremes, If I let myself I’d be sugar free, carb free,gluten free, chocolate free, plastic free, immunization free,
republican free, idiot free, face book free, red meat free, conventional fruit free, social interaction free ETC… every other day.
It’s like my head is wired to think that if I want to achieve a goal, a standard, or an idea of the person I want to be I have to give up these certain things along the way. Maybe that means no caffeine, or maybe that means not speaking to someone to prove a point, maybe I try and live without ANY sugar, or maybe I give rude looks to people I think are ignorant. That’s not very tolerant of me, honestly it just makes me look naïve. At 23, I don’t know much but I know I don’t want to be naïve, I also know I’ll probably never have a six-pack. So… why do I keep making decisions that ultimately set me up to fail, fail myself, fail others, fail a relationship, fail a goal? I think I’m giving up the wrong things, I think I’ve been giving up my humanity to be more what.. More robotic like? Non-human…. I mean really, who can live the rest of their life without sugar, but really more importantly who would want to? In the same notion I’ve been giving up my humanity to be bitter, bitter towards people I think don’t think like me, who see things differently. I have NOT agreed to disagree I simply have written people off. I haven’t given people enough patience to just be people.
One of the only things we can control in life is our attitude and the way we choice to respond to life’s situations. It’s important for me to remember that, to take things lightly, and to most importantly not be afraid of messing up, falling down, not getting that six-pack, and focus more on life, finding joy, keeping joy, laughing, loving, sharing, and having patience with myself and with others.
Moral of the story:
- I need to keep running, it helps me sort my
s h i tout.
- I need to give up things that are [actually] bad for me like bitterness, not having patience, and materialist or vain goals. NOT things like sugar, common courtesy communication to other people, chocolate, the news, coffee, friends- you get the picture…
- I also need to reconnect with the people I love, enjoy life more, laugh cry – whatever I just need to NOT be afraid to do it, and to do it in community!